Lloyd and I have picked on each other for as long as we’ve known each other, which is more than two decades. (gulp) With so much time passing, we’ve really given up on trying to be witty with our scathing comebacks. It’s pretty much devolved into:
Spouse #1: Non-committal statement about ______________.
Spouse #2: You’re a _____________.
Spouse #1 You’re mom’s a ___________. (This is advanced comebacking, and is optional, depending on how much you’re paying attention to the conversation.)
For example:
Lloyd: I need a Pepsi.
Lauren: You’re a Pepsi.
Lloyd: You’re mom’s a Pepsi.
On the way home from work today, Lloyd really cut me to the quick by derailing from the standard formula.
Lloyd: Let’s have tacos for supper.
Lauren: You’re a taco.
Lloyd: Less talk, more rock.
Lauren: (Joyful electric-guitar-y) Deeerrrnnnn Derrrrrnnn!!
Lloyd: (sternly) Less rock.
Lauren: …….*sniff*
Brad says
Hehe… I like your electric guitar sounds.
Kristi says
That’s just cold.
Kristi says
What hat are you wearing, Lauren?
Lauren says
It’s my floppy gray fleece hat -- it’s super warm! (But not very top-hat-y.)
Peggy says
1st-I LOVE your hat Lauren!!!!
2nd-Shame on you Lloyd!
3rd-Lauren, will you accompany me with your electric guitar while I sing?
4th-You’re momma’s a rock. (a guitar? Supper?)
Peggy says
5th-I’m still in 1st, right?
Lloyd says
In my defense, “Less Rock.”
Lauren says
You don’t know.
(I forgot to mention that that is the ultimate shut-down comeback. Try it with the next person who disagrees with you.)
Peggy says
Ha! You crack me up! And all is forgiven I guess beings you’re so dang funny.
Keren says
Or you can say “what now?” with a snakey-head motion and corresponding arm movements.
Or “times two” with the double fingers and a sneer.
That’s my suggestion to future derailments…courtesy of the local 12 year old boys.
Lauren says
Excellent!!