Fire Fail

May 22, 2011


I stayed home Sunday afternoon while Lloyd went to graduation and several parties, and after a splendid two-hour nap, I decided to get some burnin’ done.

Our maple trees are littering the neighborhood with their many, many seeds. I swept a bunch of them into the fire pit and thought this would be a quick burn. I had all kinds of safety plans – a small can filled with bacon grease to do a small, continuous fire (it was pretty windy and I didn’t want flaming whirlibirds setting fire to the neighborhood), and plenty of water on standby to extinguish anything that got out of control.

Not. Necessary.

The promise of bacon grease.  It let me down.

Nothing would burn! I lost my mojo! We’ve had a fair amount of rain lately but these seemed pretty dry. The ‘leaf’ of the seed would flare, then the seed wouldn’t. I guess that makes sense since it’s full of juicy baby tree. Anyway, when the can wouldn’t work, I just started making a fire on top of the seeds, thinking that would work.

It didn’t.

For an hour I sat in a smokey pile of embarrassment, trying to ignore the neighbors talking across the yard – mostly likely about my failure of a fire. (Yes, the world revolves around me. It makes travel difficult.)

Boooooooooo.  Bad tinder - BAD!

What’s wrong, fire? Aren’t we friends anymore?

About Lauren

Lauren Sommerer is a preschool teacher who likes to build prototypes, grow cats, cook things once, save money, reduce, reuse and recycle.

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5 Responses to “Fire Fail”

  1. Brad Said on:

    You should try some gasoline. That would make those water-filled seeds burn nicely.


    • Rae Said on:

      Or lighter fluid. Nothing at our house ever stays “unburned” when there is lighter fluid involved.


  2. Peggy Said on:

    …sat in a smokey pile of embarrassment. …makes travel difficult. HAHA!!


  3. Peggy Said on:

    …juicy baby tree,….sat in a smokey pile of embarrassment,…makes travel difficult. HAHA!!

    Your brush may not be on fire, but you sure are!!!!


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