Er, ‘faint of heart’. Who wants to hear a funny story about Lloyd passing out?
Now, now, put your hands down. You know I’m going to tell you.
Let me preface this with the fact that Lloyd passing out is not the funny part. I don’t think it’s amusing, it’s what he said later. I’m not totally heartless. (There are tiny bits of heart in me somewhere.)
It’s time for the annual Health Fair here in Seward. You might recall that last year I went alone. It opened at 5:30, so I got there at 5:30, thinking I would be the first one. Ha ha ha!! There are people leaving at 5:30. There are no rules in Seward. It’s mass chaos.
This year I signed Lloyd up for it, too, and drug him along. He questioned getting there so early but understood as soon as he saw the packed parking lot. The lines inside the building went fast, though, and we actually wound up sitting beside each other for our blood draws. I confided in my nurse, “He’s probably going to pass out.” She told me, “That seems to happen more with men than women.” We smiled at our superior ability to remain conscious. (I didn’t tell her about my coma-naps, though, as I treasured our brief sisterhood. Wait, coma-naps is an untold post.)
Lloyd, however, did not tell his nurse that he might pass out. He told me later that since it hasn’t happened in a while, he didn’t think it would happen. I was all done with my blood-letting and was watching him from a chair nearby. It was so quick. She took the blood, loosed the tourniquet, and he kind of nodded off like he was sleeping in church. I walked over and told her, “It’s alright, we knew this might happen.” She called for the wheelchair lady and I told them, “Really, he’s fine. This happens a lot.” By that time Lloyd was conscious and said in the politest voice I’ve ever heard him use, “Oh. How long was I out?” (It was about 20 seconds.) He sat for a little bit and we were on our way.
See? Not funny. Kinda sweet. I drove us home and recounted the play-by-play to him, then asked him how it was from his end.
“I remember the needle, and thinking that it wasn’t so bad, and then….. I shouldn’t say this, but my next thought was, ‘There could be blood everywhere!’ and then I was out.”
I laughed and laughed and laughed!!!! That Lloyd – making passing out funny since 1998.