No, you’re not.

April 24, 2013


I’ve been doing some self-assessment lately, and since I’ve been muttering this stuff to myself, I thought I’d mutter it to you. Let me tell you about being oppositional.

I was a very oppositional child. I wasn’t mean about it or anything, but I know I would frustrate my mother to no end because I ways always saying ‘no’. Shopping with younger me was a real joy.

Mom: “Do you like this shirt?”

Me: “No.”

Mom: “How about this one?”

Me: “No.”

Mom (strained voice): “How about this one?”

Me: “No.”

Mom : “Fine. Go naked.”

Me: “No.”

You can imagine.

As an adult, I am very aware that I am still oppositional, but I can’t seem to control it. I do my best to stifle it, and do a fairly good job of keeping it inside much of the time, but it leaks out quite often.

The funny part is that ‘oppositional’ doesn’t mean ‘negative’, it just means that whatever you’re thinking, I’m (either internally or externally) trying to pull you back to center. You’re acting negative? I’m going to be super happy!
You’re feeling good? I have a downer story for you.
You’re trying to be helpful? I don’t need your help.
You’re not helping? I feel superior.
You’re super conservative? Lighten up.
You’re extremely liberal? Look around, people.
You’re looking on the bright side? Inner eye roll.
You’re rolling your eyes? Come here and let me punch you.

So. There’s that. More like this tomorrow! Or maybe not.

About Lauren

Lauren Sommerer is a preschool teacher who likes to build prototypes, grow cats, cook things once, save money, reduce, reuse and recycle.

View all posts by Lauren


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7 Responses to “No, you’re not.”

  1. Deborah Said on:

    Keeping us level. I appreciate that.


  2. Peggy Said on:

    So if I say potato, you’ll say potahto
    If I say tomato, you’ll say tomahto,

    Eether, _________________,
    Neether, ________________,


  3. Lauren's mom Said on:

    I say you get that from your dad. Dad says you get that from me. 🙂


  4. Brad Said on:

    So does that work like reverse psychology? What if I said: “You will NOT give me $100.”


  5. Kristi Said on:

    So, with you, everything balances out. Kinda like that episode on Seinfeld. Elaine loses her job, and George lands a great one.


  6. Kris Said on:

    I LOVE your definition of “oppositional.” Awesome.


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