Lloyd stayed home from school again on Tuesday. His fever had broken sometime during the night, which once again meant that he drenched the bed in sweat. (Ew.) We’ve been sleeping separately for some time (Brad, I confiscated your bed for it’s ability to be tipped at an extreme angle. Future post.), so at least I wasn’t bothered by it.
When I got home after a meeting tonight, the lump on the sofa handed me an envelope covered with chicken scratches.
“I wrote you a post,” it mumbled.
“What’s this?” I asked as I sprayed it with Lysol.
“The things I’ve learned from daytime television.”
Well, after deciphering the scribbles, I’ve decided he’s right – this needs to be shared with the world.
Lots of people have structured settlements or annuities that they need to turn into cash.
Every insurance company is cheaper than every other.
There are many law firms ready to help me if I have any of a number of medical complications at no cost to me.
Gears of War 3 comes with its own special edition Playstation or maybe X-box.
Campbell’s Soup may be poured over potatoes.
AllState Insurance is affordable if you eat ramen noodles every night.
Alex Trebek and the AARP do not agree on where I should get my Medicare supplement plan.
There are probably raccoons in my attic.
The Waltons are on at least 4 times daily.
He needs to get back to school before his brain turns to mush.
Brad says
Wait! I think Lloyd may be on to something… Perhaps there are secret messages in these statements. If you take the first letter of each line, you get LETGCAATT. Hmmm… What could it mean? Lloyd as GOT to stay on it. He’s so close to a breakthrough… Quick! Give him more cold medicine!
Beth says
I believe he’s trying to say, “Let’s get a cat.”
I would agree.
Kristi says
Maybe if he stays home long enough, he can clean the house for you??
Peggy says
HAHAHA! You funny L&L!
And I think I have to agree with Beth….having a pet when you’re sick is the best. Well, when you have a dog anyway.
Jill says
“I’m the smartest raccoon I know. I just had, like, 4 babies.”
I might like that commercial. A lot.
bekahcubed says
Daytime television is definitely … educational. So much so that I find it hard to focus on work when my neighbors across the hall are blaring their television (I work in long-term care and my office is right amongst resident rooms).