A while back, I jokingly said to someone that Council Fire was my mediation. It was an effort to make it seem more important than just the fact that I like to burn stuff up. But then I thought about it, and I might be onto something.
I read an online discussion about mediation and different people had different input about it. One of the comments that struck me was that it wasn’t about being quiet, it was about observing your thoughts. He had the story, A woman in a field watched a man on a racing horse barreling toward her. She asked him, “Where are you going?” He shouted back, “I don’t know – ask the horse!” The goal is to not be the man being carried away, it’s to be the woman watching it happen. There was other stuff that I’m never going to get right, but the conversation was really about just being with your thoughts – not trying to ignore them, but just to observe them. Think it, then let it go away and see the next thought: like being at the aquarium and your thoughts are the fish.
I think I was born for that.
The part I love about my little ritual is all the fuss to get ready: Busting up some kindling, making coffee, putting layers on over my pj’s, lighting the fire and just watching it. I like it more than sleeping in, which is crazy.
I talk to God a little. I usually have a snippet of a song cycling through my head. I have arguments with people that I’m too chicken to talk to in real life. I debate about the pros and cons of putting a wood stove in the shed.
It’s just me, the dark, and the fire. I watch the neighbor’s windows light up and listen to the two little neighbor boys open their sliding door, run out with their dog and tromp through the snow with their flashlight.
I really like it.