Straight lines. Straight lines!

Let me make it clear from the start that though I am going to mock him thoroughly in this post, I really love Lloyd.

I rarely walk home from work anymore since I mostly drive the truck. On the rare occasions that I do and I know Lloyd won’t be coming home anytime soon, I walk down Seward Street to 7th Street. There are store windows to peek in, and Dollar General is open late and I can stop in to browse and warm up. It’s enjoyable.

Here’s the route. Notice the straight lines of this journey?

If I know Lloyd is home, I might call him for a ride to pick me up, then convince him that as long as we’re in the car, we should swing by Subway for a sandwich. (It’s an easy sell.) I tell him where I’ll be: On Seward Street or on 1st Street.

See, when I walk home in the summertime, occasionally I’ll call him at home and ask him to meet me. He grumbles, but he’ll do it. He walks 7th street to Lincoln Street, and I walk 1st street to Lincoln Street. See how we’re just following straight lines?

(Now the mocking begins.) On Tuesday morning my truck wouldn’t start, so I caught a ride to school with Lloyd. We had a staff meeting until 8 p.m., and afterwards I walked out to my truck…. that wasn’t there.

No problem!

I started walking and called Lloyd for a ride. “I’ll be on First Street,” I said.

Now I ask you, dear readers who are not even married to me, by what I’ve just said, if you were at Point B and needed to drive to get me, wouldn’t you drive down Lincoln and turn on 1st?   So would I, because we are reasonable people. That’s why I like you.

Back to my long, stupid story: A few blocks into my walk I was creeped out by a male fellow pedestrian. I called Lloyd again so I’d be on the phone in case MFP tried to talk to me or ninja-chop me. I could sense by the echo-y sound of Lloyd’s voice that he had not yet left the house. “I’m putting on my shoes,” he said.

Really?

I kept walking and kept walking, and as I rounded to Lincoln I wondered where he was. I kept walking a couple more blocks and called again.

Lauren: “Where are you??”
Lloyd: “On First Street. You don’t seem to be here.”
Lauren: “I’m on Lincoln now.”
Lloyd: “You said you’d be on First.”
Lauren: “Not forever.”
Lloyd: “I drove around. You weren’t here.”
Lauren: “Grrrrr. I’m almost home.”
Lloyd: “Oh.   Do you still want a ride?”
Lauren: Facepalm